PFLAG Door County
Parents, Families and Friends
of Lesbians and Gays

 

Advocacy, education and support

 for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people,
their families and friends.

  

Don, Kyra and John at the 2008 PFLAG Picnic           Sandy at AIDS Walk Wisconsin

 

ALL ALLIES ARE WELCOME!

Monthly Meetings: 5 p.m. on the 3rd Sunday of each month at Hope Church, 12th & Michigan in Sturgeon Bay.

 

Questions?   Comments?

Please feel free to contact Sandy Brown at:

 

e-mail: sbrown@itol.com
Phone: (920) 743-8146

 

Join us online!

Click here to join pflagdoorcounty on Yahoo!
Click to join pflagdoorcounty on Yahoo! Groups.

Summer Saturdays

On Saturday Mornings, from July into October, look for us at the Sturgeon Bay Farmers' Market with our Information & Social Gathering booth.

(Off Michigan St. & 4th Avenue)

 

Please stop by to say Hello!


Thank You for Your Support!

 

We appreciate your support:  PFLAG of Sturgeon Bay - Door County is a 501-C-3 non-profit organization and an official chapter of PFLAG national.   Your financial support pays for the materials needed to carry out our mission of community outreach, support and educational.  Your help will make a difference in our community and is greatly appreciated.  Thank You!

PFLAG Door County
PO Box 213
Sturgeon Bay, WI 54235

 

Grocery Store Receipts: Every little bit helps and both Econo Foods and Pick 'N Save of Sturgeon Bay will generously donate a percent of your purchase amounts to our organization.

  • Pick N' Save:   Stop at the Service Desk to name PFLAG Door County as the organization of your choice. #603180        NOTE: If you have an older Advantage card, you were able to name 3 charities on your account - if you change it now, you will be limited to one charity so you may not wish to update it.

  • Econo Foods:  Save your receipts and turn them in at our regular meetings; mail them to our address above or call Sandy.  Econo Foods will give us a percentage of the total - as long as the receipts are clearly visible, there is no time limit on them.  


 

"That’s so gay!"

A message from Shirley Senarighi - PFLAG Door County School Safety Coordinator

 

     "That’s so gay!" I recently heard one child saying to another in the midst of a game. The receiving child was obviously ticked off, but continued playing for a short while. The parent who overheard the comment said to me, "What do you do? All the kids seem to be teasing like that."
     Silence can be perceived as acceptance. When the parent said nothing, both children perceived the statement as "okay." Phrases like "that’s so gay" are prejudicial and, depending on the situation, can be considered harassment.      So when an adult hears a child say "That’s so gay!", what is it parents, grandparents, and teachers can do?


     Name it, claim it, and stop it!

Name the behavior that just occurred: "I think I just heard you say That’s so gay. That’s disrespectful and could be considered harassment."

Claim how the words makes you feel: "I don’t like that. It is hurtful language."

Stop the behavior from being repeated: "I don’t want to hear those words again." And if you hear them repeated, intervene again and again.

 

     You might also give the children alternative words to use. Example: "I think I just heard you say… That’s so gay! There are some other things you could say, like… That’s ludicrous! That’s irrational! That’s weak! That’s goofy! That’s annoying! That’s surreal! That’s yesterday! That’s interesting! That’s absurd! That’s curious! You can use other words!"

 

Shirley Senarighi produces public service radio announcements as the PFLAG Door County School Safety Coordinator and as a Community Correspondent for www.DoorCountyDailyNews.com.


PFLAG Policy Matters  March 9, 2010

Front Page Headlines

New Report Exposes Serious Flaws in DADT Support Letter.  A number of high-ranking military officers whose names appear on a well-publicized letter supporting “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” were involved in career-ending scandals or have said the letter doesn’t represent their views, according to Servicemembers United.  The organization’s preliminary investigation of 200 names on the letter, which more than 1,100 flag and general officers signed, reveals new information that could undermine the document supporting the 1993 law barring gays from serving openly in the military.  Alex Nicholson, executive director of Servicemembers United, said his organization’s report “speaks to an overall lack of expertise” the signers have on the perspective of service members of the 21st century military.

ACLU Battles MS High School AdministratorsLast week, the American Civil Liberties Union and Mississippi Safe Schools Coalition teamed up to demand that Constance McMillen, a Mississippi High School Student, be allowed to attend prom. However,- school district officials seem to be making that dream a little difficult.  Itawamba County School District officials told McMillan she may not arrive at prom with her girlfriend, that she may not wear a tuxedo, and that should other students become “uncomfortable” with her and her girlfriend’s presence, she will be asked to leave.  “Prom is supposed to be about all students being able to express themselves, have fun, and make memories that will last the rest of their lives,” said Kristy Bennett, Legal Director of the ACLU of Mississippi. “Constance has a constitutional right to take the person she’s dating to the prom, just like any other student at any other public school.” 

Catholic Preschool Discriminates Against Same-Sex Couple.  A Catholic preschool in Boulder, Colorado will not be getting an “A” for Acceptance after telling a lesbian couple their child is not allowed to return to the school next year.  Sacred Heart of Jesus Catholic School decided that the student would not be allowed to enroll as a result of the sexual orientation of the child’s parents, according to an NBC 9 News report.  In a statement to 9 News, the Denver Archdiocese wrote that parents at the school are expected to follow teachings of the Catholic Church, including the teaching that “Homosexual couples living together as a couple are in disaccord with Catholic teaching.”

Public Policy Watch

Rep. Stark Reintroduces the Every Child Deserves a Family Act.  Rep. Pete Stark (D-CA.), sponsor of the Every Child Deserves a Family Act, is planning to reintroduce the bill — which would prohibit discrimination against LGBT people seeking to adopt children — after making some positive changes in the bill with the assistance of PFLAG National .  Additionally, on March 11, Rep. Stark plans to lead a congressional briefing panel on Capitol Hill featuring discussion from experts on LGBT adoption. The dialogue is intended to educate lawmakers on the bill’s importance.

Lieberman Introduces Senate Bill to Repeal DADT.   Last Wednesday, Independent Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut introduced the Senate’s first “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” repeal bill along with 11 Democratic co-sponsors including chair of the Senate Armed Services Committee Sen. Carl Levin of Michigan.   Unfortunately, no Republicans have signed on to co-sponsor the bill.  Lieberman told The Advocate, “To me, it’s very important that we repeal this law, both because it’s fair and consistent with basic American values of equal opportunity, but also because it’s a very positive step for the military to take in terms of military effectiveness and readiness.”

DC Marriage Equality Law Takes Effect.  At the culmination of a three-decade struggle for marriage equality, advocates celebrated the first day that marriage licenses were issued to same-sex couples in Washington, DC.  Many community activists had long known that the D.C. Council would approve same-sex marriage, but the timing had to be right. Congress and the White House could have killed the bill, so advocates waited for a president and legislature sympathetic to gay rights and home rule. In the meantime, the LGBT community picked up important rights in the District, including a domestic partnership law, before the council passed the same-sex marriage bill in December.

NY State Assembly passes GENDA.  Last week, the New York State Assembly passed the Gender Expression Non-Discrimination Act (GENDA), a bill that would outlaw discrimination in New York State based on gender identity and/or expression under the state’s Human Rights Law.  Currently it is legal in New York to be fired from your job, kicked out of your home or be denied credit or public accommodations (like service in a restaurant) simply for being transgender or gender non-conforming.  Transgender and gender non-conforming New Yorkers face severe discrimination.  GENDA has already passed twice with bipartisan support in the State Assembly. If you live in New York, we need you to be prepared to take action to push this necessary bill onto the Senate floor for a vote!  For more details, please click here.

Cuccinelli Asks Colleges to Rescind Policies Protecting Gay State Employees. Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli II has asked the state's public colleges and universities to rescind policies that ban discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation, arguing in a letter sent to each school Thursday that their boards of visitors have no legal authority to adopt such policies.  In the letter, Cuccinelli (R) wrote that only the General Assembly can extend legal protections to gay state employees — a move the legislature has repeatedly declined to take, even as recently as this week.

A Question from the Field

Dear Policy Matters,

Last week I learned that Representative Pete Stark will host a briefing sponsored by PFLAG National on his bill, the Every Child Deserves a Family Act.  It’s wonderful to note that the briefing will be streamed live as I plan to watch it remotely. 

As you can imagine, the issue of adoption is hugely important to me and my family as I live in the only state in the country that bans all LGBT people from adopting (ironically, state law does not prohibit LGBT individuals from fostering).  If this bill becomes a law, how will it impact same-sex couples in Florida?

Thanks,

Caitlyn, PFLAG Member, Florida

 

Dear Caitlyn,

Thank you so much for your question!  You are correct in noting that on March 11th, a briefing on the Every Child Deserves a Family Act will occur thanks to the sponsorship of Representative Pete Stark and PFLAG, along with the American Psychological Association, the Family Equality Council and the Society for Psychological Study for Social Issues.  PFLAG members in DC are highly encouraged to attend the briefing in person; the briefing will be held in room H-137 inside the US Capitol Building, and for those who wish to view the hearing remotely, you can visit Representative Pete Stark’s homepage and watch it live-streamed by clicking here.

Regarding your question on Florida’s statutory ban prohibiting LGBT people from adopting, once the bill is enacted into law every state will be prohibited  from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation, gender identity or marital status of any prospective adoptive or foster parent, or the sexual orientation or gender identity of the child involved if the state wants to continue to receive federal funding.  Once the bill passes, specific guidelines will be issued by the Department of Health and Human Services on how to comply with the law.  PFLAG plans to advise HHS on the writing of those specific guidelines.   If Florida’s Department of Children and Families, along with contractors that carry out the services of adoption and foster care, fail to abide by this new law, the federal government will restrict funding of the state entities employing discriminatory practices.  

Ultimately, this child welfare bill aims to open up more safe and supportive homes to the estimated 500,000 children in the U.S. foster care system.  Approximately 120,000 of these children are available for adoption, and tragically, 72 percent of children are waiting to find a permanent, safe and loving home in a state that restricts LGBT people from serving as foster or adoptive parents.  In 2007, roughly 25,000 young people “aged out” of the foster care system.  Research shows that these young people are at a high risk for poverty, homelessness, incarceration, and early parenthood.

PFLAG National will continue to lobby our Congress members on the hill, and we encourage everyone across the country to schedule in-district meetings with your members, share your stories about adoption and foster care and urge your representatives and senators to co-sponsor and pass this critical child welfare legislation today!

Warmest Regards,

Policy Matters

Please note that Policy Matters will return on March 23, 2010.  If you would like to have a policy-related question featured in our next edition, please e-mail it to rperry@pflag.org no later than March 19, 2010.

 


 

Sign Up for our Newsletter!

Sign-up for our Newsletter

If you have news or events to include, please send to Sandy before the first weekend of each month.


 

Movies We've Enjoyed

  • "Out of the Past: the Struggle for Gay and Lesbian Rights in America" - it's got some good history, particularly of the beginnings of Gay Straight Alliances in schools.  

  • "The Celluloid Closet" - a history of gays in the movies.  IMDB Listing

  • "MILK" - the story of Harvey Milk, the first gay city councilman in San Francisco who was shot and killed along with the Mayor.  IMDB Listing

  • "Brother Outsider: The Life of Bayard Rustin"  A film of the life of Bayard Rustin, who worked closely with Martin Luther King Jr. for civil rights.  IMDB Listing

  • "For Love and for Life: The 1987 March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights" - For Love and For Life places the 1987 March on Washington in perspective among the major political events of our times.  IMDB Listing

  • "The Laramie Project" - When a small town comes face to face with murder, everybody has a tale to tell.   IMDB Listing

  • "Before Stonewall" - The history of the Gay and Lesbian community before the Stonewall riots began the major gay rights movement.   IMDB Listing

NOTE: If you have suggestions for good LGBT history films, let me know.  (Let's stick to her/history here.)

 

 


 

Recommended Reading

 

Positive Voice has a great book list and  I recommend: "Crisis:  40 Stories Revealing the Personal, Social, and Religious Pain and Trauma of Growing Up Gay in America" edited by Mitchell Gold.  He says it "exposes a tragic mental health crisis", giving statistics on gay suicide and detailing "who and what is contributing to the silent epidemic of depression, isolation, and fear, and what can be done about it."  He has created a website for the book and more stories:  www.CrisisBook.org

 


 

LGBT Links

Angels of Hope MCC -- A Metropolitan Community Church for Green Bay, Appleton and northeast Wisconsin.


Fair Wisconsin
-- A state advocacy organization dedicated to equal rights for LGBT people.

 

GayChurch.org -- LBBT welcoming Christian church directory.  This link lands on the Wisconsin directory.

 

Gays for God --  GLBT directory of faith communities - Christian and Non-Christian.

 

In The Life --  Documentary stories from the gay experience.


Local GLBT Guide
-- A national guide to local GLBT resources in all U.S. states and territories.


NEW Pride -- The Web site for an LGBT Pride event in Northeast Wisconsin -- held July 12, 2008, and planned again for 2009.  Supported by the Green Bay Action Network (GBAN).


PFLAG Fox Cities -- (link hasn't been working) Serving Appleton, Green Bay, Oshkosh, Fond du Lac and surrounding communities.  128 N. Oneida St., Appleton, WI 54911  Hotline number is 920-882-4056. Monthly meetings held in the Multicultural Center in downtown Appleton (next to Harmony Cafe)


PFLAG National
-- Our national organization, with news releases, Action Alerts and information on issues for LGBT people, family and friends.


PFLAG of the Greater Oshkosh Area, Inc.
-- Serving Oshkosh, Fond du Lac and the east-central Wisconsin region.


Positive Voice, Inc. -- A social, educational and support organization for LGBT people in Northeast Wisconsin. Social meetings Thursdays, 6-9 PM at Angels of Hope MCC.

 

Pride Alive --  Northeast Wisconsin Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Pride celebration, will take place this summer to celebrate the LGBT community and to connect with the larger Northeast Wisconsin community.  The celebration also aims to promote a positive LGBT presence in the community and to bring together the various groups that fall under the LGBT rainbow.   This year's event is on July 11, 2009 at Joannes Park, Green Bay.


Wisconsin Rainbow Families
-- A Milwaukee-based organization dedicated to GLBT parents, families and kids throughout the state of Wisconsin. Find family resources online.

 


 

Online Resources

  • Yahoo! Groups: If you want to send emails to a list of PFLAGers  and see our growing list of resources, go to this link:   http://groups.yahoo.com/group/pflagdoorcounty/ and sign up.  If you have trouble connecting or figuring it out, just let me know.  I can just add you so you can send emails to the group.  Pictures are also posted there.  

  • Lesbians only:  Have you heard of "Lesbian Connection"?  It's a free magazine to lesbians worldwide, or $42 if you can afford it, see www.LConline.org.  

  • In the Life: Documentary stories from the gay experience.  Episodes are viewable on the web and downloadable as well.  If you go to www.inthelifetv.org  you can find the episodes you want to view there.   

  • WI Chapter leaders, if you are not on the Yahoo Wis pflag group, here is how you get on...go to http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WI_PFLAG/ and click where it says "join".  Also, someone from each chapter should be on the pflagall list.  Let me know if you need to get on that one

  • PFLAG's rural Yahoo! group, PFLAGinruralAmerica is a closed group that you'll need approval to join. The group is set up specifically and reserved for chapter leaders and chapter members in rural communities.  Please go to http://groups. yahoo.com/ group/PFLAGinrur alAmerica/ or e-mail bsmith@pflag. org for an invitation to join the group.

  • The Story of PFLAG:  I'm mailing this on National Coming Out Day!  President Obama shared the story of PFLAG--Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays--as "the story of America" in a speech on October 10, 2009, Watch it on YouTube!

  • Will & Trust Kit: Suze Orman, an out lesbian and financial guru, is offering us free access to her online Will & Trust Kit!  Go to her site, www.suzeorman.com, click on Will & Trust Kit, then click on "Gift Code" (on the right), then enter "people first", and "activate kit now."

New Links


 

CALENDAR OF EVENTS

 

REGULARLY OCCURRING MEETINGS/EVENTS

 

PFLAG Door County meeting at 5 p.m. on the 3rd Sun. at Hope Church, 12th and Michigan, Sturgeon Bay.  (Map)

 

PFLAG Greater Oshkosh Area meeting on the 2nd Tuesday at 6:30 pm at First Congregational Church, 137 Algoma Blvd. in Oshkosh.  PFLAG of the Greater Oshkosh Area

 

PFLAG Point meets third Tuesday of each month from 6:00 PM – 8:00 PM.  They are still working on finding a set location.  Anyone may go to  www.pflagpoint.com or phone (715) 572-6922 for more information. 

PFLAG Manitowoc County - meets the1st Thursday of the month, 7 to 8pm at St. James Episcopal Church, 434 Nth 8th Street, Manitowoc.  (Map)  Look for their yahoo group, too.  PFLAG in Manitowoc County

 

PFLAG Sheboygan meets on the 4th Monday at 7:PM at the Sheboygan Area Unitarian Universalist Fellowship - , 708 Erie Ave. Sheboygan

 

PFLAG Washburn - meets on the 4th Tuesday of each month at 7:PM in the lower level of the Washburn Public Library located at 307 Washington Ave in Washburn.  PFLAG Washburn

 

Positive Voice Drop-in Program  Join PV and Conversation Cafe at the Harmony Cafe for a fun evening of chat!  (1st Thursday of the month at the Harmony Cafe, 1660 W Mason St, Green Bay  map )

Thursday, November 5th, 6 – 8pm

Thursday, December 3rd, 6-8pm

Harmony Cafe in Green Bay, West Mason next to Toys R Us, every Friday, Conversation Cafe, 11:30 - 1pm, hosted by Cricket and John O.  Click HERE for all the services that Harmony Cafe offers.  map


EVENTS BY MONTH


"Fine Tuning Your School to be an Emotionally Safe Place for ALL"

Professional Development Opportunity for Educators

Funded by NEA/WEAC Safe Schools Grant and PFLAG of Door County

with the support of Sturgeon Bay Schools & Individual Contributors.

 

Click HERE to see what was offered in our 2009 program.


Contact Us

Sandy Brown
PFLAG Sturgeon Bay/Door County
PO Box 213
Sturgeon Bay, WI 54235
920-743-8146

sbrown@itol.com

 

Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.
---Martin Luther King, Jr.


PFLAG and PFLAG PARENTS, FAMILIES AND FRIENDS OF LESBIANS AND GAYS are registered trademarks and service marks of Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, Inc.

Thank You for visiting us on the web at: www.PFLAGDoorCounty.org

Please help us build our community of support & education by forwarding our web address to family and friends.

 


 

Click HERE to offer feedback, comments, or report problems on this page.